Singing mindset skills: dealing with positive opinions!
A couple of weeks ago we had a music night with my adult private students. At Auckland Singing School, we work hard to ensure the performances happen in a comfortable and non-judgemental environment. This requires training in some aspects such as singing mindset skills.
Sharing our voices with the world can be a scary experience sometimes. Because we are quite vulnerable to it!
Plus, at Auckland Singing School we work with holistic singing lessons. Meaning that we have in mind not only the voice science aspects of what specifically happens in the vocal tract, but also how other factors have influence over it.
For example, if you are in a perceived or real dangerous situation, your throat will react by closing. That is why it is so hard to sing in public!
So when you start performing it is important that you do so in an environment that you don’t perceive (consciously or unconsciously) threatening. And for that, training your singing mindset skills will be your most powerful tool.
Every music night for private students at Auckland Singing School, we have a special theme. For this music night, we used “Bright Side Sheets”.
Singing mindset skills experiment: Bright Side Sheets
Well, you probably know that we are our worst critics. So for this music night, every singer had a “Bright side sheet” of paper. All the other participants were invited to write down what they like about that singer.
It is very common that singing students focus only on what didn’t go amazingly well in their performances. They tend to not notice all the things that DID go really well!
Plus, if you are focused on what is not going great you are missing out on being present in your performance and most importantly, enjoying it!
The goals of the experiment
The Bright side sheet experiment had a variety of goals related to training our students’s singing mindset skills.
- Helping students see the things that people enjoyed about their performances. In most cases, we think that we did awful and we miss that a lot of people enjoyed our performance and had a great time! It is good to have a different perspective, rather than thinking that everybody focused on that particular note that wasn’t “belted” properly!
- Helping students realize that singing is not about being perfect. It is mainly about having fun! Of course, we train to be better vocalists every time, but when we perform it is not time to focus on details. It is time to enjoy and to express ourselves! Letting go of the need of having a perfect performance in every aspect will give you creative freedom and so much joy!
- Helping students get in touch with their own uniqueness, rather than comparing themselves with others. At Auckland Singing School we have adult singers of all levels. Also, no one really is a beginner! We all have been through a lot with our instrument. Some people were always around music and some people never had the chance.
So comparing ourselves with other singers is not useful. The bright side sheets helped students see that they all have something very special and unique about their singing, no matter how advanced or beginner they are.
Bright side sheets experiment: the experience for the listeners
This was an event for students only, so most people did perform. So everybody had the chance to have positive feedback on their performance, but also to write their thoughts for others.
The learning experience for the listeners was to be an active listener and to be able to focus on the things they did like about each singer. Some people tend to gravitate towards what they don’t like. We have the chance to focus on what we do like. It was a nice experience to observe the uniqueness of each fellow singer.
How does being an active listener help you?
- You can choose whether to focus on what you like or what you don’t like. The choice is yours!
- It helps you be a better “judge”. Being in a judgemental environment means that people around you focus on some things they perceive as negative and disapprove of you for that. Being negative is quite a lot easier than being positive! But if you want to create a positive environment for everyone – including you – the best you can do is to work on your own judgment.
- It helps you be PRESENT. Nowadays attention span has decreased substantially. It is rare and a privilege to chat with someone without them checking on their phone constantly. People get distracted way too easily nowadays.
Being present helps you be a better performer, a better listener, and a more human person without being in a constant limbo of distractions.
- It improves the sense of solidarity and community between musicians. We live in a pretty selfish world where we mostly only care about ourselves. On the music nights with these kinds of activities, I can observe with much joy how much people blossom as soon as they are gently invited to cooperate with each other.
How did people take the experiment?
Of course, there were a variety of responses! Some people were very appreciative of the experiment and made the most of it. Some people however didn’t enjoy having positive feedback on their performances. And some people did not want to write for anyone.
That is OK. Some people were ready for it and some people weren’t. Maybe they will be ready next time. Mindset is a “muscle” we constantly train in singing and as with any other aspect, the progress and each person’s process is unique. And we take it at each person’s pace.
Summarizing
I could see that regardless of the variety of responses, the Bright Side Sheets at the very least made people open their minds a bit regarding performance and active listening. Even those who didn’t actively participate in the exercise!
As singers, part of the training is training our mindset to cope with other people’s opinions of us. People will have opinions about us, and we have to understand that personal opinions are not facts. Some people never get the courage to sing in front of others because of the fear of what other people might think. What if we were skilled enough to cope with whatever they think?
Do you want to join our fun and friendly community of singers? We have singing lessons and group classes for adults, teenagers, and kids. Online programs are also available!
Take your singing lessons in Glenfield (Auckland), or get our online programs!
Coming soon: singing classes at Hobsonville point (Auckland)
All the singing lessons are taught from a holistic approach.
During lockdown, all our singing lessons and classes are being taught ONLINE.
I help people to develop their voice and singing from a holistic approach. I teach vocal lessons in person in Auckland, NZ, and online. Also stay tuned for my new online singing programs!❤️
My greatest passion has always been the voice, music and energy arts.
My personal and artistic journey has led me to understand that the voice and the body are fully connected, and that includes not only the physical body but also the mental, emotional and spiritual body.
Through holistic vocal training you not only learn to become a great singer while taking care of your voice, but you also improve your mental and physical wellbeing❤️
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